Category — moms

Being a parent is a roller coaster ride – it has it’s high’s and low’s, it’s moments of thrilling joy – and terror.

But it’s a roller coaster that I am so thankful that I get to go on.

I have learned more about God through being a Mommy than I had ever thought possible.  And with two completely opposite girls, well, I am learning a bit about myself too.

We have one child who truly has a servant’s heart.  She will clear the table without being asked, she will share just about annything she has with others, and her goal in life seems to be to make others happy.  And we have one who has a master’s heart.  She wants to be served, to make all of her own decisions, and she only wants people on her terms.  Like a 9:30 at night when she is supposed to have been asleep for an hour – yep, that’s when she wants to have deep, meaningful conversations.

Don’t get me wrong, she has amazing qualities of her own.  She cares deeply, she is very artistic and creative, and she is the friend that will defend you to the end (or the mortal enemy that will fight until the end!)  The struggle of parenting her though is much more of a struggle.

So, knowing that I have a child with a low self-worth, who expects to have everything go her way and then decides that the world hates her when it doesn’t, and knowing that it’s apparently not something we did as parents that made her this way, what advice would you give?

Well, I finally figured something out this weekend.  I was talking with a friend a few weeks ago about this very topic, and was advised to figure out how to make her think that she is the one making the choices in her life.  The majority of our battles come from her being told to do something, and her not wanting to be told what to do.  However, when you are a child, well, let’s just say that a family isn’t a democracy, nor is it anarchy.  At least it shouldn’t be.  A family is a monarchy – ruled from the head down.

When you are living in a monarchy, it’s not very typical to see the peasant’s making the decisions instead of the king, correct?  But what about the daughter of the king?

Ah, there’s the rub.

The daughter of the king wants to have a little pull, to flex a little decision-making muscle.  After all, if her Daddy is the king, she should have some power, right?

It could just work.

I decided to try a new tactic this weekend – almost by accident.  When it comes to things that don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things I’ve decided that I’m not going to fight it.  I’m not going to force my will upon her.  I’m not going to suck the air out of the room and scream & yell (not that I do that!) and force her to bend to my will.  Nope… I’m just not going to care.

And somehow, it worked.

On the non-essentials I. Don’t. Care.

I don’t care if she refuses to dress up for church (I used to – biiiiig family battles as I was walking out the door to lead worship and leaving her Daddy to clean up the emotional mess and get her dressed – usually in what I had said no to).  I don’t care if she folds her socks & underwear nicely before taking them to her room.  I don’t care that she loads the dishwasher in a way that totally drives me bonkers (well, at least I try not to let her see it!) and it seems to be working!  She gets to choose how she does these things and they are getting done without a fight.

This morning she didn’t want to get out of bed on time.  She wanted to stay home and get a couple more hours of sleep and then “miraculously” feel better around 10 am.  The problem with that today – beyond missing the beginning of school and letting her practice laziness and hone her skills at manipulation – is that I don’t have a car.  I have no way of getting her to school if she doesn’t ride the bus.  Ah, so she’s sure she can get her way.  She’s figuring that she can get a couple more hours of sleep, get up around 10 or so, and watch movies, play Wii, etc.

That won’t be happening.

I told her once she had eaten breakfast and was pretty much ready for school we would talk about it.  As I walked out of her room to send her sister off to school I told her that she would be spending the day in her room – ALL day – but that it was her choice. After all, she could always spend it cleaning her room.

As I was watching her sister walk down the hill towards the bus stop this morning I heard a mad scramble to grab the already-prepared lunch box and shove it into her book bag as she slipped on some shoes.  She chose to go to school.

And because I didn’t care, she didn’t feel that she was being forced to do it.  She looked at the choices before her and decided that school was the better one.

There was no battle of wills, there was no fight.  And I now get to have a peaceful day of work instead of a day of constant struggle against her wanting to do what I said she couldn’t do.  And she gets to go to school and learn.

It’s like a win-win.

I know that some reading this might have a problem with allowing kids to make more choices and “get their way,” but I can assure you that on the issues that matter there is no choice.  On the issues that matter they are given the “choice” between doing what they need to do and punishment.  But on the little things that don’t matter we are letting them learn to make decisions for themselves so that as they grow up and have to make those bigger choices, well, hopefully they will have learned enough about making choices that whey will make the right ones.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Yep, it’s that gushy, pink-and-red holiday that’s all about luuuv.  ugh.  *grin*

But on a happier note, we had a great morning at Falcon Ridge Fellowship today!  We led All Because of Jesus for the third week, and we debuted another new song today – one that I was really excited about.

We had almost everyone there this morning – we were missing our usual bass player, but David switched over and played today so the sound was great.  The best part though?  I got to sit in the congregation and take communion with Eric… and that hasn’t happened in a looooooong time.

Anywho, here’s the setlist:

• Rain It Down [G] Carlos Whittaker
• All Because Of Jesus [G] Steve Fee
  
• Glorious [Bb] Brenton Brown/Paul Baloche
• You Never Let Go [F] Matt Redman/Beth Redman
• kids storytime
• Glorious [G] Chris Tomlin/Jesse Reeves…
• announcements
• Message
• You Gave Your Life Away [E] Kathryn Scott / Paul Baloche
• Communion message
• My Chains Are Gone – chorus only

We introduced @loswhit‘s new single Rain It Down this morning, and the band was sooooo excited to do it.  It is such a fun song to sing and play, and (hopefully) that enthusiasm was contagious.  I had posted on my FB age a couple of weeks ago that we would be doing it & everyone should download it, and (fortunately) a few had done that and already knew it.  However since I know that a few will be asking where to find it I’m posting the link again – if you want to download it, head over to iTunes here.

All Because of Jesus is a great tune too, and we have a lot of fun with it.  They play it quite a bit on the local christian station up here, so most people already knew it – helpul when your teaching something new. It’s great to see most of the congregation singing along when you’ve recently introduced a song to them.   Baloche’s Glorious is like that too – people connected with that one almost immediately, and it quickly became one of the favorite songs.  I think Glorious and Here I am, Send Me are our two most requested songs.  Having both Glorious’s on the list today was a little confusing, but it worked out great.

Well, I’m off – Eric is taking me shopping for something sparkly and we have to drop the girls off at a friend’s first, (well, after we finish grouting the rest of the tile – soooooo romantic!)  so I’ll catch you later!

As always, this is part of the Sunday Setlist bloggy carnival over at TheWorshipCommunity.com – check it out!

So, how was your service this weekend?  Any songs you loved?  Any you loved, well, not so much?

I have two beautiful daughters.  They are still young, and thankfully they are still enjoying the protection and shelter of our home.

However…

They are getting to the age where they are wanting to go to friends houses, being invited to sleep-overs and are beginning to test the limits of their boundaries and enjoying some tastes of independence.

These are good things – don’t get me wrong – but as a mom of two beautiful girls I have concerns.

• How can I protect them when I am not around?
• Have we taught them and guided them enough that they will stay within the boundries that we have set up?
• Will they remember the rules that we have set for them when they are not at home?
• Will they truly understand that they need to guard their eyes to protect their hearts?
• Will they come to me if they have questions?
• Will they come to me if they chose to break a rule and need help?
• Will they come to me of someone else breaks those rules for them?

These are a few of the concerns that I have as I send them out each day.  I have to trust God for these things (among so very many others!) and know that He is in control.

However, some girls were not so lucky.  Some were not protected and taught to guard their eyes to protect their hearts.  Some chose to disregard those lessons.  Some chose to just take a peek – after all, what harm can just a peek do?

Just a peek.

Just a peek can start us down a path that is tangled and hard to find your way out of.  If you or someone you know has started down this tangled and crooked path I have good news for you.

You are not alone.

And I have better news…

Help is available

A friend of mine has been there.  She has lived on that tangled and crooked road, and she has found the path that well bring you back off of it.  The best part?  She is sharing that with the world.

Yes, if you or someone you know has ever struggled or is currently struggling with porn, Crystal and DirtyGirlMinistries.com is here to help.

If you need help, it is there.

Yeah, I thought that might grab your attention… What could I be talking about that is smooth and sexy? Why legs, of course! Legs that have been cooped up in jeans and long skirts for far too many months and are aching to get out and enjoy some sunshine!

Well, while we did have sunshine today, it was a kinda rare thing in these parts… we still have a few months of rain to look forward to before Summer officially arrives, but I know that some of you are already enjoying Spring, and your legs want to be beautiful to enjoy it!

Yes, I’m going to tell you about a new product that you just might fall in love with…
it’s called “Smooth Away” and it’s a replacement for your trusty (but hopefully not rusty) razor. Really

So what is Smooth Away anyway? Well, it’s a system that uses 2 paddles (one fits on your finger, the other on your hand) and micro-crystalline pads that gently remove hair and exfoliates at the same time!

Basically, you attach the pad to the paddle (it’s kind of rubbery) and gently rub your legs in a clockwise motion, then a counter clockwise motion and the is gone. The finger-size works well for facial hair, fingers, toes, ankles, etc. THe large paddle works well for arms and legs – larger areas.

Yes, you feel like you are sanding away your unwanted hair with an extremely fine-grained sandpaper. But it really does work! And if you are one of those women who just has a hard time getting along with a razor, this may be your perfect solution! No more kicks, cuts or razor burn. And I can guarantee that it is MUCH less painful that waxing! In fact, it doesn’t hurt at all.

So, where can you find this great new product? Most any drug store carries it – CVS, Rite Aid, Sally Beauty, Walgreens, etc – or you can order it online at GetSmoothAway.com.

Yes, it takes a little bit longer than shaving, but it also leaves your legs nice and soft. They also have a Hair Inhibitor Moisturizer that you use after using Smooth Away to moisturize your skin, and keep your hair from growing back as quickly. Did I mention that it smells a little like coconut? Its like a visit to the tropics! Who cares if we can’t enjoy real sunshine yet – we can smell like we are!

Go check it out – no more razors, no more wax, no more expensive laser treatments! Just soft, smooth, sexy legs. Just in time for Spring and Summer!

Yes, I’m one of those moms… my kids take their lunch to school every day, and they use a lunch system that cuts down on the amount of waste that they generate (generally none!)

A week or so ago I came across a new lunch box system that I must admit, I fell instantly in love with!

They are called Kids Konserve, and they are made from stainless steel instead of plastic. The lunch set comes with a 16 ounce stainless steel beverage container, two 8-ounce stainless steel containers, a food kozy (for sandwiches and food items), and a cloth napkin all conveniently stored in a reusable recycled cotton sack. The lunch kit retails for $40, and you can order everything inside separately.

Personally, I love the look of the stainless steel, and since my kids never have to warm anything up it works out great. They come in a couple of different fabrics too – caterpillars, butterflies and the original green – and they are all cute!

But why should you invest in something like this instead of the cheap plastic lunch boxes that we see everywhere?

Well, for starters there is the waste issue – and this is generated mostly from kids who bring their lunch. According to the Center for Ecoliteracy, the average elementary student generates between 45-90 pounds of plastic bags, foil, and additional waste in school lunch programs annually. That’s a lot of waste! It is coming from the single-serve containers that are getting sent to school – chips, applesauce, juice boxes, etc. With a lunch box system like Kids Konserve, you can buy in bulk and just portion out what your kids will eat each day.

Oh, and if you are able to buy foods in bulk instead of single-serve pre-packaged containers, the cost is MUCH less! A jar of all-natural, organic applesauce costs me $3.50, and I can get a lunch-sized portion for 2 kids for a week out of that. The single-serve containers come in a package of 6 (only 3 days) and cost $4. Chips are even worse.

They also offer a Tiffen in two sizes – child’s and adults. These are great stackable containers that don’t take up much space. Kind of like a Japanese bento box…

So, what am I sharing all of this for? Well, KidsKonserve.com has generously shared a coupon code with us! Yay!

The discount lasts from Feb 1 – March 31. Just head over to their site – kidskonserve.com – and use the coupon code “alex” to save 10% off your total order.

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I know… there is always the question of your kids remembering to bring their lunch box home… I have 2 girls – 1st & 2nd grade – and they have been taking their lunch to school every day since they started school. Only once has either of them forgotten something, and one of their friends saw it and brought it to them before school was out. If they understand that it is important to you, they will make it a point to keep it important to them too. With the name tag built into the bag it’s even easier! Just write their name on it just in case, and it will find it’s way back to them.

Kids Konserve is a mom-owned company that is trying to do their part to help the environment, one family at a time. Let’s help them out and tell others too!

I received a fun package in the mail last week… it contained 6 of the new Quaker True Delights chewy granola bars. And a coupon to get more (good marketing there…)

The flavors we received are:

• Dark Chocolate Raspberry Almond
• Honey Roasted Cashew Mixed Berry
• Toasted Coconut Banana Macadamia Nut

Since there were 2 of each, I had intended to eat one of each and do a giveaway with the others, but I do have a family living here with me. I managed to get 2 of the bars. It worked out though, because I am not a fan of coconut.

So, what are these things and why am I telling you about them? Well, Quaker is getting on the “health bar” bandwagon and offering up granola bars that not only taste great (yes, they really do) but have ingredients that you can actually pronounce!

My favorite of the 2 that I tried is the dark chocolate raspberry almond (I know, big surprise there), but the berry was also very tasty. My 6 year old LOVED the toasted coconut banana macadamia nut one – I had to wrestle the 2nd one away from her to keep her from eating the other one too.

While I applaud Quaker for getting better with these than their other granola bars, I still take issue with the fact that they are filled with corn syrup… not high fructose corn syrup, but corn syrup, corn syrup solids, sugar, fructose, oligofructose (whatever that is), more sugar, invert sugar, oh, and more sugar. Yes, that many different listings of some form of sugar on the label. They also have soy in them, along with natural and artificial flavors and caramel color.

If I may… have you tried the Lara Bars? They have less than 10 ingredients (usually closer to 5) ALL are actual, naturally occurring foods, and they taste great. Another great snack is Erin Baker’s Breakfast Cookies & Brownies. Again, short ingredients list (no corn syrup or soy) and great tasting. Mrs. May’s Trio Bars are also great – fruits, nuts & seeds.

Quaker is getting better, and for that I am thankful, but I would really like to see more all-natural foods on our shelves! I am tired of having to read labels to make sure there isn’t things in them that my kids can’t or shouldn’t have.

So, if you want to try these out yourself, leave a comment below. I have one Honey Roasted Cashew Mixed Berry left (I’m hiding it!) and a coupon for $1 off a box of them that I will ship out…

I’ll also throw in a Laura Bar and a Trio bar for you to try (just because I like them so much!)

What do you need to do?

Comment below… do you eat granola bars often? Have you ever tried any of the more natural ones? Do your kids eat these? That’s one entry…

For a second entry, add this giveaway to your blog. Send a trackback or add a second comment letting me know where to look for it.

Third entry… tweet this post!

The drawing ends at 11:59 pm on Monday, Feb 2nd, so that just gives you this weekend to get your entries in. I know you can do it though.

Thanks and good luck!

**Contest is closed – Congrats!**

I know I have not done too many giveaways here on this blog, but that is something that I would like to change moving forward… and I have a couple in the works.

The first one, however, is designed to help you out in the midst of these tough economic times.  It’s a small booklet entitled “101 Ways to Spend Less When Raising a Family” and there are some great tips there-in.

I actually picked it up a while ago, but never got the chance to post the giveaway… then it got lost in the shuffle of papers (oops!)

Better late than never, right?

What do you need to do?  Just share your favorite frugal tip below and I’ll draw a name on January 31 for the winner!

During these times it is more important than ever for us to be able to stretch our dollars to feed and care for our families, and I am hopeful that this little booklet will help someone find even more ideas and ways to make their budget go further.

Good Luck!

Yes, I know, everyone is dealing with the “Current Economic Crisis” and we are ALL getting tired of hearing about it. Well folks, it’s about to get worse.

On Feb 10, 2009 the new CPSIA will go into effect. What is this new regulation you ask? It will bring about the end for so many small businesses in America.

The Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act makes it illegal to sell ANYTHING geared towards the under age 12 set. ANYTHING.

For those of us that shoe at second-hand stores, guess what stores will no longer be legal to operate?

For those that sell their kids old clothing, toys and books to make some extra cash, guess what you can be thrown into jail for. Oh, and get a whopping $100,000 fine PER OFFENCE.

For those of us who like being able to buy locally, handmade, sustainably made toys and clothing for our kids, sorry, those are now illegal – or cost so much that no one can afford them anymore.

Yes, it looks like it is just targeting toy manufacturers in China, but who are the real targets of this regulation?

• Second-Hand stores
• Work At Home Moms
• Craft Fair Vendors
• Small Toy Manufacturers
• Low- and mid-income families that cannot afford to buy retail
• everyone who has to buy ANYTHING for their kids, because the cost will be going up
• Employees of small and mid-sized businesses that manufacture or sell children’s goods – they will most likely be out of a job
• Every tax-paying American – just who do you think will now be supporting all of the people who will now be out of a job? Paying for the debt created by all of the businesses going bankrupt?
• The Chinese people. Yes, this is an odd one, but the working hours are already way past what should be allowable, the conditions are horrific, and they aren’t paid enough to ever get ahead. Does anyone really think that forcing China to produce MORE will help this?

Now, who will be benefiting from these new regulations?

• China – that is the only place anything will be able to be manufactured anywhere near affordably – and the products still won’t pass the necessary testing because of the next group
• Large Corporations – they make so much that these new tests will simply be absorbed and the cost passed along to you – the consumer. But they won’t really care about safety – eventually they will find a way to allow their manufacturers to go back to the less expensive way of doing things.

Once again our government is making the rich get more by stealing it from the poor – and anyone who isn’t already rich! The “Middle Class” that we enjoy in this country is slowly being erased. We are heading back to a system of the few wealthy controlling the masses of poor, ill-cared for people.

For those of you that think this will not affect you, wake up and smell the load of crap they are feeding you! EVERY American will be affected. The poor will no longer be able to find products to clothe their kids cheaply, the middle class will be put out of business – thereby becoming the poor – and every taxpayer will foot the bill.

Socialism, here we come.

Please, I beg you, take the 5 minutes to send a letter to your Congressmen and -women, to your Senators, to the CPSA, to everyone you know! There is a poll up at Change.org where you can vote to get the word out about issues to our new President-Elect Obama. You can visit and cast your vote on this issue at:

http://www.change.org/ideas/view/save_handmade_toys_from_the_cpsia

Yes, it calls out handmade toys, but this is so much more far-reaching than just toys.

And for those that think I’m just chasing after the dollar, please believe me that I care about the safety of all of our kids. I have 2 of my own, and at this time I try very hard to feed them healthy, wholesome foods that actually are grown rather than coming out of a box. I try to make sure that their clothes are modest and will last. I prefer to get them toys that have as little plastic in them as possible. I prefer to get them outside into nature as often as possible. We don’t have TV in our house. We don’t buy clothes, school supplies or toys that are emblazoned with Hannah Montana and other brands that are being forced down the throats of the American public.

These alternative choices will soon be gone. No more sustainability manufactured handmade toys, no more going to the 2nd-hand shop for back-to-school shopping and being able to trade in old clothes for new ones so it doesn’t cost $200 in August to put clothes on their backs that fit.

Please, take a few moments to get informed. Spread the word.

Even if you don’t have kids, you will still be paying the price for idiotic legislation. Even if you are financially ahead of the game, you will still be paying for it.

The “Current Economic Crisis” is fixing to get a whole lot more “crisis-y” We are heading for a recession the likes of which have only been seen during the Great Depression, but it will soon be illegal to use many of the things that helped Americans survive the last one. Oh, and there are a whole lot more people alive now than there were then.

America has always been known as the land of the free, but we are slowly trading in those freedoms that we so cherished out of fear and giving those with the money more and more control over what we can and can’t do. 9/11 made us trade in freedoms in transportation, the lead in toys from China will be trading in our freedoms of choice. Yes, we need to protect our kids, but forcing them to only have the option of mass-produced junk that will fill our landfills even faster is not the answer.

Now that I’ve once again thrown this out there, I will step off my soap-box.

Oh, and I’m adding this in the the Thrifty Green Thursday carnival, because it affects so much of what we do to reduce, reuse and recycle.

Have a nice day.